MILKING IT.

There are some things that we need and the people that make these things know it. they also know how to charge for these things, knowing that we pay up or suffer. Razors are a good example. Disposables are cheap enough but so are the results. Good quality replacement blades however, cost an arm and a leg. These things are turned out in the millions at next to no cost, yet the retail price defies description. It's called Profiteering and we put up with it, and the biggest profiteers of all are Central Government, particularly when it comes to Duty on cigarettes, fuel, and alcohol.

Anyhow, this particular gripe has been pulled out of the hat after a trip into town to purchase some sunscreen. There has been a big thing of late about the need to cover up in the sun and to regularly apply sunscreen because of the rapid rise in reported cases of skin cancer, mostly due to over exposure to the sun. Various scare tactics have been used by companies that would like us to buy their products, but having just purchased some sunscreen I can see why skin cancer is on the increase. The last bottle of sunscreen that I purchased cost around six pounds. It seems that the current asking price is around fourteen pounds for 200ml (around 7fl oz in old money) for something that is apparently going to save our lives. Only, it isn't. It's ultimately going to cost lives because not everyone can afford to pay stupid money for a bottle of sunscreen that will only last an average family a few days.

Profiteering on this scale at the expense of public health really is criminal. It won't be long before the Government of this fine nation finds a way of charging us a Suntan Tax to pay for the rises in cases of skin cancer treatment on our terminally ill National Health Service. Not so long ago we all received a crappy little booklet telling us what to do in the event of a national emergency (Tesco's running out of Gin and Tonic etc). I wonder how long it will be before we receive another one telling us what to do in the event of waking up to a gloriously sunny day.

• If it's sunny, proceed to the nearest drugstore.
• Select your favourite sunscreen and take it to the till.
• Pay for your sunscreen and pay your suntan tax.
• Return home.
• Apply as much sunscreen as possible. Don't forget, we need you to buy another bottle very soon.
• Enjoy the rest of the day indoors because it's too hot outside, or maybe it has just started raining.

How many millions of gallons of this stuff is manufactured every year? Surely it can't be that expensive to produce? furthermore, why does it have to be repackaged every year? How long does it take someone to redesign a plastic bottle and how much does it cost? Add to this the cost of retooling and new screen printing to make said bottle. HELLO! Planet Earth to Sunscreen Man. Just leave the f***ing bottle alone and stop ripping us off! It doesn't matter if the bottle is shorter, fatter, and a slightly paler shade of whatever colour. Does the product work and is it affordable, that is what matters. And Mr Sunscreen Man, when you're sunning it up on a Maldive beach, think about all of us who can't leave our own houses on a sunny day because we can't afford your products anymore, and remember who put you on your beach in the first place because you're taking the piss!